An Open Plea to the Public: Enough With the Brad/Jen Crap, Please!

Perhaps you've heard that Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston used to be married. You may have also heard that Brad fell in love with Angelina Jolie while the two were filming Mr. and Mrs. Smith in 2004-05. Subsequently, he divorced Jennifer and quietly took up with Angelina, with whom he started a large family as the result of multiple adoptions and three biological children. Oh gosh, did you hear?

Yeah, of course you did. None of the tabloids have been able to shut up about it for the past six years. That's right. SIX years.

Sure, it was scandalous at first. Back then, it was even funny when it was in the right hands:

You can't help but laugh at this classic gem ... even though both the situation and the song "My Boo" are both totally, and annoyingly, played out.

But, awesome cartoons aside, Brad/Jen is a point that's now almost totally moot. Again, this happened six years ago, so why are we still being subjected to headlines like Nov. 26th's "Jennifer Aniston & Brad Pitt Narrowly Miss Each Other at the Movies"? Does America really continue to care that much about their divorce? I realize it was a hot scandal at the time, but I simply refuse to believe that there are that many people who are still invested in this.

Exhibit A: Brad has moved on.

Remember when Angelina was a one-woman tornado of crazy sh!t? She was cooler back then.

Exhibit B: Jennifer has moved on.

I'm willing to bet that this Theroux fellow has a bit of the ol' crazy tornado goin' on, too.

So, come on, people. Let's complete Exhibit C and show these tabloids that America has moved on, too. After that, maybe we can unite for a real cause ... like putting an end to world hunger ... or something. Sound good?

Great!